Monday, March 27, 2017
Dearest Abg Dae
I guess you can't hear me..or maybe with Allah's permission you can..anyway I just want to tell you that this week has been so so stressful for me..Im facing situations where I don't think I can solve them...and the worst part is I can't call you or mak and I don't want to burden Along with work stuff..she has her studies to worry about being in the final semester in sya Allah...rationally I know Allah hears all my worries..but I still wish you were here to refer to..for me to find the solution to all these that I have to handle...I can't wait to finish the term ..another 9 months to go..in sya Allah... I still remeber mak's advice to me after you passed away..sabarkan aje...and your advice to me always..perkara ni takkan lama...
Saturday, January 7, 2017
The beginning of the New Year is a memorably sad one for me because its the day you passed away..I remembered once I posted on a new years day in 2013 that I would get over the "I can't " syndrome to the "I can and I will" action...and then suddenly when you left me...its back to the drawing board I guess
Its been three years abang since you passed away to be with our Creator on the 1.1.2014...but I still feel the same about you... I still wish you were with me but that wish will never come true I know
I went to your resting place on the 1.1.2017 with Ilham and I doa that you are in a good place among good souls In sya Allah..I console myself by the fact that everything is temporary and I truly beleive my dear that you are in a better place and that Allah is keeping you safe from the miserable things happening here on earth...
Ilham started at SMIDE in Subang Jaya ...he is so happy and I am so happy too...this was what we planned...also the SOVO is completed and now we are searching for a tenant..I know abang that this is what you planned and I will finish this project in sya Allah...for everyones sake
I still have a year to complete as head in the department...everyone around me is applying for kenaikan pangkat and we did talk about this right ..in sya Allah once I complete the term I will follow through what you and I planned..in sya Allah...
Wednesday, November 16, 2016
Everyday when I drive to work I think about you. I realise Im not that smart about a lot of things eventhough I have gone through a lot of process of learning and pain and sadness...I still don't understand a lot of things happening around me and how to handle the best...Thats when I miss you the most...You always try to answer all my queries..without being judgmental or emotional..always cool and calm...I miss that... and I still cant find another person who is like that...like you...non judgemental, wise and patient...
I truly hope I can find one..maybe not like you but close enough in sha Allah and ameen..
Thursday, November 3, 2016
Not much difference really, a mom will always be a mom..single or not...I still drive the kids here and there, cook them their favourite food (simple dishes of course - not some complicated dish of course) settle any arguments between abang and adek, worry when Along comes back late and nagging them to wake up, solat and take a shower...
I guess the most glaring part is going out to eat outside and pretending their dad is away outstation or something...
Until we meet again my dearest Adae